We Haven’t ‘Already Won’ on Gay Marriage — Just Ask These Two Moms Fighting to Keep Their Family Together (VIDEO)

Diana and Ariana

WATCH: Diana and Ariana have been together for over a decade. They are raising their two-year-old daughter Gabriela

Last week was one for the history books. The world watched as the U.S. Supreme Court heard oral arguments in two cases asserting that the U.S. Constitution does not allow states or the federal government to exclude lesbian and gay couples from the institution of marriage.

Day one was the Proposition 8 case. Reports tended to be pessimistic. The tea leaf readers told us that the justices had recoiled at the big ask: marriage equality nationwide for same-sex couples. These same pundits generally agreed that on day two, a slim majority seemed to have little love lost for the narrower issue of the Defense of Marriage Act’s unprecedented federal definition of marriage.

Despite this mixed bag, the media breathlessly proclaimed that the gay marriage fight was already won. Most of us were all too busy celebrating future victories to notice the inherent contradiction.

The DOMA Project sign at the Supreme Court on the day of oral arguments of Windsor v US

The DOMA Project sign at the Supreme Court on the day of oral arguments of Windsor v US

Reality check: It was not smooth sailing for LGBT advocates in the Supreme Court last week, and a home run in both cases is unlikely.

Sure, there were thousands of LGBT activists noisily rallying outside the court, vastly outnumbering the contingent of increasingly fringe opponents. And, yes, it is true that, as Chief Justice John Roberts so inelegantly put it to Edie Windsor’s lawyer, “political figures are falling over themselves” to endorse gay marriage. One after another, elected officials have been proudly announcing that their opinions have “evolved” in our favor. Just this week Sen. Bob Casey (D-Pa.) and Sen. Tom Carper (D-Del.) became the 48th and 49th incumbent U.S. senators to trumpet support for marriage equality. Then Sen. Mark Kirk (R-Ill.) became the 50th, and only the second Republican in the Senate to defy his party’s current platform. Meanwhile, Time blasted the headline “Gay Marriage Already Won” across its cover, along with a sultry photo of a lip-locked same-sex couple. The relentlessly shrill right-wing blowhard Rush Limbaugh conceded, “The genie is not getting put back in the bottle. And I think that’s right. I don’t care what this court does with this particular ruling, Proposition 8. I think the inertia is clearly moving in the direction that there is going to be gay marriage at some point nationwide.” And even Fox News’ Bill O’Reilly agreed that gay and lesbian Americans had essentially won, saying:

The compelling argument is on the side of homosexuals. That’s where the compelling argument is: “We’re Americans. We just want to be treated like everybody else.” That is a compelling argument, and to deny that, you’ve got to have a very strong argument on the other side. And the other side hasn’t been able to do anything but thump the Bible.

While this is all very exciting, it could be bad news for proponents of marriage equality. Have we already forgotten that only shortly before California voters passed Proposition 8 in the first place, public opinion polls suggested that this constitutional amendment would be easily defeated on Election Day? Were you one of the many who assumed that Prop 8 would never pass? Did you do anything to help the LGBT community and our allies secure equality in 2008? What are you doing differently now?

Forty-one states still deny same-sex couples the right to marry, and every agency of the federal government denies the very existence of married gay and lesbian couples. We cannot afford to drink the Kool-Aid this time.

Instead, we must continue to share our stories and take inventory of the ways in which discrimination still affects our daily lives. If we do not, if we relax our guard and cease to engage our family, friends, neighbors and elected officials in an ongoing discussion about our shared humanity, we risk missing a crucial opportunity to seize the moment and make this momentum yield actual change in our daily lives. Let’s not forget that genuine equality involves far more than marriage. We have a long way to go.

Changing our Facebook profile photos for a hot minute is but a baby step in an otherwise arduous journey. So much remains at stake for countless LGBT families still struggling every day, precisely because we have not won. Reversing legal inequality requires repealing unjust laws or persuading courts to strike them down. It is a “long game” process that cannot be avoided because of a sudden avalanche of confident magazine covers, cheering headlines and newly enlightened politicians.

To this day, the United States federal government offers no protection for married, binational same-sex couples. Two years ago, to great praise from the LGBT community, President Obama denounced DOMA as unconstitutional because it impermissibly denies recognition to married lesbian and gay couples for all federal purposes, including immigration. But did his administration stop enforcing it? No. Lesbian and gay binational couples remain shut out of green cards and fiancé(e) visas, two key elements of our family unification-based immigration system. As a result, LGBT families are still torn apart, forced into exile or left fighting every day to remain together in this country. None of them feel that we have already won, and to say that is an insult to their struggle.

 

This video is part of the collaborative series “Love Stories: Binational Couples on the Front Lines Against DOMA,” produced by the two of us for The DOMA Project and The DeVote Campaign.

Ariana and Diana are one such couple. They have been together for over a decade. Their beautiful daughter Gabriela is a nursery school student who has no idea that her moms are at the center of the fight for true marriage equality so that she never has to be separated from either of them. Because of DOMA, Ariana cannot sponsor Diana as her spouse to legally live, work or even drive a car in this country. Diana has not been back to Colombia since she first arrived here 12 years ago, seeking safe haven from violence that had claimed many close to her, and threatened her too, especially as a lesbian. She hasn’t seen her Colombian family in all these years. They can’t get visas to come visit her here, and she is trapped in the U.S., because she could be deported for a minimum of 10 years if she leaves.

Becoming a parent made Diana confront the consequences of discrimination like never before. It meant everything for her to introduce her parents to Gabriela, so Ariana traveled alone with their daughter to meet Diana’s parents in Bogotá. As Diana relates the story, they fell in love with their granddaughter. Little Gabriela is the only connection they have to their own daughter. Looking at the photos of her parents with Ariana and Gabriela, Diana brushes away tears. She has no idea when or if she will see her parents again.

Truly fighting for equality means understanding this enduring struggle as if it were your own. Winning requires reaching out within and beyond the LGBT community. The issues we are facing are not merely about sexuality. They are about humanity. Until the basic freedoms that form the bedrock of this country are made available to all citizens equally, we have not yet won, and we cannot declare victory.


Originally published by Brynn Gelbard and Lavi Soloway at HuffingtonPost

Los Angeles-based writer and filmmaker Brynn Gelbard started the DeVote Campaign in 2010 after having to cancel her wedding because of the passing of Proposition 8. For more, visit devotecampaign.comfacebook.com/devotecampaign and twitter.com/devotecampaign.

In 2010, with his law partner, Noemi Masliah, Lavi Soloway launched the DOMA Project, a campaign to stop the deportations, separations and exile of binational lesbian and gay couples. For more, visitdomaproject.orgfacebook.com/thedomaproject and twitter.com/gaybinationals.

Unwilling to Accept DOMA Separation or Exile, Brad Files a Fiancé Visa Petition Now to be Reunited with Chris

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Brad and Chris

Chris and I met on Facebook a few years ago through a friend suggestion.  Even though he was from Uruguay and I was living in Michigan, we shared a lot of common interests, so I sent him a friend request.  We started out as friends with a love for gaming, especially XBox, and similar tastes in music. Like far too many Americans, I was unaware of how DOMA affects gay and lesbian Americans with foreign partners.  Though I knew that the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) existed, I had no clue what impact it would have on us.

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Last year, I traveled to see Chris four times.  Our first meeting was in early April.  I spent the Easter holiday with him and his mother.  This was my first international trip and getting my passport was exciting for me.  It is a true privilege to have an American passport, allowing one to travel freely to almost anywhere in the world.  Sadly, not everyone has that privilege.  As an Uruguayan national, Chris needs a visa to come to the United States.

Prior to my first visit, we had Skyped and exchanged several e-mails, pictures, and texts but there is nothing like meeting the love of your life face-to-face.  After my eighteen long hours of travel, I was exhausted and sweaty.  Being unfamiliar with immigration and customs, it was a process just to get through that line and finally reach the concourse where I saw him for the first time.  We rushed to each other and gave each other a big hug.  I apologized for being “sweaty” but he had no problem with that.  He was a gentleman and took my luggage and then we left the airport to catch a bus.  He took my hand and we kissed for the first time.  It was spectacular and I knew then this was going to be someone really special in my life.

After my first heartbreaking journey back home, I decided to leave earlier for my visit the following month in May.  That visit was as great as the first as we really started to get to know each other and strengthen the foundation of our love.  On May 12, I asked Mama Rosa (Christian’s mother) for permission to marry him.  After her acceptance, I then asked him to marry me and he accepted.

Wanting to visit me in the United States, Chris applied for a visitor visa in June and was denied.  This disheartened and saddened us, but our relationship was strong enough to face that set back.  I again went back in September, during my birthday, for another good visit.

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My last visit was in December for Christmas and New Year’s.  What a difference it is in Uruguay as December is the beginning of their summer!  It was 103 degrees on Christmas Eve and even for there, it was hot.

In between all of my visits with Chris, I continue to do research every day on how to get him here.  Our three “options” include 1) riding the tide with the Berlin Wall of DOMA staring at us in the face; 2) transferring within my current company to Canada where they would welcome Chris as my family; or 3) living exiled in Uruguay, something that we will not be forced to accept.  Due to my limited Spanish, moving to Uruguay would make finding work difficult for me.

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DOMA currently destroys bi-national families and rips them apart.  Like any heterosexual couple, I should be able to file for a fiancé visa, but I cannot do so because of this law.  We have used modern technologies to help keep our relationship strong.  Chris and I communicate by Skype on a nightly basis.  We also use a great app called Voxer where we can instantly send voice messages, quick pictures, or instant messages.  We also still communicate through Facebook and e-mails.  However, there are times when we feel like prisoners, trapped on opposite sides of a border, on opposite sides of a screen.  We should not have to rely on technology to be together.  We deserve equality like any other couple in our situation.  We deserve the right to be together.  Because I cannot sponsor Chris for a fiancee visa, I am being treated as a second class citizen. 

I have been in Uruguay with Chris since last week while the Supreme Court heard oral arguments in the cases challenging Proposition 8 and DOMA.  I will return to Uruguay to be with Chris again in June when the Supreme Court is expected to rule on these barriers to our happiness.  I have great optimism and hope that the nine justices will do the right thing and deliver a strong message to all Americans that gay and lesbian Americans are deserving of equal treatment in our civil institutions.

With the help of The DOMA Project I am now filing for a K-1 fiancé visa for Christian to finally be able to come to the United States where we hope to marry in Illinois, if that becomes possible, or otherwise in New York. As the The DOMA Project continues to advocate for full equality and securing the post-DOMA future, the Obama administration must be proactive about adapting to what we hope will be a resounding defeat for DOMA at the Supreme Court.  By filing our fiancé visa petition now, we are letting my government know that we fully expect our petition to be approved on Day One, post-DOMA.  We should not be forced to wait one day longer to be together.  In the meantime, we must continue to pressure the Obama administration, acting through the Department of Homeland Security and the Department of State, to defer final decisions on such petitions until a Supreme Court ruling on DOMA, and then, once a ruling comes, to expedite processing of all cases involving same-sex binational couples who are exiled, separated or threatened with separation.  As we get closer to what I hope and expect will be the end of DOMA, there can be no excuse for denying fiancé visa applications.  Like any couple, we simply want the security of being able to build a life together.  We are hopeful that DHS Secretary Napolitano and Secretary of State Kerry will do everything in their power to support our aspirations of forming our own family in Michigan.  Along with the rest of the binational community we look forward with much anticipation to the day K-1 visas are approved for all our fiancés.  Keep telling your stories. Find out more about fiancé visa petitions from The DOMA Project and help us all work together to ensure that we use the next three months to keep up the momentum that will bring us full equality.

Separated from his Husband Juan by the U.S.-Mexico Border, Brian Joins DOMA Project Rally at Supreme Court

Our story begins in February, 2011. I remember as if it were yesterday. I had planned a trip to Mexico City and I had chatted with this wonderful guy ahead of my trip. We agreed to meet in the Zona Rosa (the pink zone) at a karaoke bar. I was waiting outside the bar when I heard my name being called. I turned and there he was, the guy I just knew would be special to me. We talked outside for a minute and then walked into the bar. He loves to sing and put his name down for a couple of songs. As he sang, he looked at me and it was as if he was singing directly to me. I had a feeling this guy would somehow always be in my life.

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Our story begins in February 2011 with a trip to Mexico that changed my life. I remember as if it were yesterday. I had planned a trip to Mexico City and I had planned to meet this wonderful guy I met on line at a karaoke bar in Zona Rosa, a gay neighborhood in the capital.  I was waiting outside the bar when I heard my name being called. I turned and there he was, the guy I just knew would be special to me. We talked outside for a minute and then walked into the bar. He loves to sing and put his name down for a couple of songs. As he sang, he looked at me and it was as if he was singing directly to me. I had a feeling this guy would somehow always be in my life. We had a wonderful weekend together seeing the sites of the big city. I didn’t want that weekend to end but the day came that I had to leave. We sat at the airport talking, wondering where to go from here. We both had fears of trying to take this somewhere further due to distance and cultural differences not realizing what other obstacles lie ahead. We parted with a “maybe some other time”.

Over the next couple of months we continued to talk, seeing each other occasionally on video chat. Something was forming between us, something real and something unexpected. I had to see him again. I agreed to come back for Gay Pride in June. This was a defining moment of our relationship. He was proud to introduce me to his friends and family. We decided we both wanted to be together despite cultural differences, distance and the discriminatory laws of the U.S. that would deny us the chance to be together.

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Together Again

For more than two years, I have traveled to see Juan once every two months, a costly and frustrating part of our relationship, but very necessary nonetheless. We have discussed the future we would want to have together, the hardships and the frustrations of being a gay bi-national couple. We decided we would endure whatever obstacles would be thrown our way. The relationship advanced even with these obstacles.

On September 19, 2012 Juan and I were married. Juan became my legal husband under Mexican law, in a ceremony performed by a civil judge. I will never forget the judge saying that it had been years since she had seen two people so in love. She said she was honored to be able to perform our marriage. The reception had to come later since traveling to Mexico so often while keeping up with the financial burdens of our respective households left us with limited savings.

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Our Civil Marriage Ceremony

On January 19, 2013 we held a big reception to celebrate our marriage. It was beautiful. The venue exquisite, overlooking a historic Catholic church. With our family and friends we celebrated our union and our promises to each other. The celebration included traditions of a Mexican wedding ceremony depicting the strength we will have with our family and friends beside us and the dedication they have to ensure it. The family plays a very important role in the strength of a Mexican marriage.

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Our Traditional Wedding Reception

So here we are, legally married in Mexico yet still our marriage is not recognized by the federal government under U.S. law. This horrible DOMA, which defends no marriage but seeks to destroy ours, keeps us apart, unable to be together, unable to live and enjoy life together in this country, unable to continue on our journey. DOMA is discriminatory and harmful; it doesn’t allow us to be together because I can’t sponsor him as my husband. Juan has little chance of getting a visitor visa anyway, this is true for most Mexican citizens. He will have an even harder time overcoming the presumption of immigration intent that all Mexican applicants for a travel visa face.  Thus, it is unlikely that the U.S. Embassy will even issue him a travel visa to visit me here in the U.S.   Hillary Clinton, as Secretary of State, did nothing to help our partners access visitor visas even when they could demonstrate absolutely that they would comply and return home at the conclusion of their visit.

According to DOMA our love is not equal, we are not equal, we are “less than.” I don’t want to leave my country. We have plans, desires, and dreams of our future including living here in the U.S. until my retirement and then perhaps moving to Mexico and enjoy the rest of our lives together. But DOMA forces me to think of exiling myself from my country and my family so that we can be together now. I pray every day that DOMA will be found unconstitutional and we will be allowed to continue our journey.  I believe we can bring about that change and that is why I have done everything I can to participate in this incredible, empowering movement for equality.

Our marriage is a traditional marriage. In fact the word “traditional” has no meaning in this context except one: a marriage based on love. Our love is just as precious, and real; and our will to be together, as determined as an other couple. Our marriage is not perfect; no marriage is. We have our differences just as any couple does.  But we are strong. I believe our simple troubles are magnified immensely because of DOMA, the financial frustrations of being forced to live apart and constant worries of our future with DOMA in place. Honestly, there is no difficult issue that we face today that doesn’t lead back to DOMA and the discriminatory immigration policies of this country.

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Our Honeymoon in Teotihuacan

These are our feelings and this is our life. Two years have passed. Two years I have traveled to Mexico to be with the man I love at enormous financial cost. For two years we have lived apart, missing birthdays, holidays, and the difficult moments when all one of us needed was a comforting hug from the other. I want to wake up every day next to my husband and fall to sleep at night with him in my arms. I have hope that someday soon this will become reality.

We have sacrificed, yet we have had to say goodbye time and time again. We have suffered financially, emotionally, and mentally. We have cried. We have been angry. Yet, we are still as determined as ever to wake up next to each other every morning. If this isn’t real love then I really don’t know what is. Love is love; it comes in many forms. This is ours and the outcome of our lives and our love will not be undermined by archaic discriminatory laws and those that support them.

Brian Cain at SCOTUS

Last week, I joined the thousands gathered to rally outside the Supreme Court as the 9 Justices of the Court heard oral arguments for and against Section 3 of DOMA in Edie Windsor’s case for equal treatment under the law.  Like Edie, I trust in the principles enshrined in our Constitution.  I too believe that justice will prevail.

Edie Windsor

However, this land of freedom and equality does not yet live up to its promise. With much hope and determination, I am fighting so that some day very soon we will achieve true equality.  I am an American through and through, but I am ashamed of how gay and lesbian binational couples are treated under current immigration law and DOMA. We are better than that. It is time for us all to join our family, friends, and community in urging our leaders to hold true to our founding principles.  Though today we were outside the Supreme Court, our message was no doubt heard by millions over the news and social media.  A message this large cannot be ignored, certainly not by the 9 Justices of the Supreme Court.  Please join me in spreading this message around the country.  You can do your part by sharing our story or even sharing your own.  Together, we will make a difference in the court of public opinion, helping to shape the Supreme Court’s decision, and ultimately our post-DOMA future.

 

Separated by 5000 Miles, Art and Stuart Urge Supreme Court to Respect Their Marriage and Their Family and Strike Down DOMA

My name is Art.  I am a music teacher in San Antonio, Texas, and a veteran of the U.S. military.  Most of my life I have spent pursuing mastery of my instruments: the piano, the organ, and the voice.  I also love computers and social networks, which is where I ultimately met my (now) husband, Stuart.
In the summer of 2009, I saw a news report on television about Facebook, a now-ubiquitous social networking site that had at the time become a part of my life, as it had for so many others.  As a curious computer person, I logged in and discovered how fun it was to meet all sorts of people from around the world.  With this new site, many new friendships and conversations started.

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Art and Stuart

My name is Art.  I am a music teacher in San Antonio, Texas, and a veteran of the U.S. military.  Most of my life I have spent pursuing mastery of my instruments: the piano, the organ, and the voice.  I also love computers and social networks, which is where I ultimately met my (now) husband, Stuart.

In the summer of 2009, I saw a news report on television about Facebook, a now-ubiquitous social networking site that had at the time become a part of my life, as it had for so many others.  As a curious computer person, I logged in and discovered how fun it was to meet all sorts of people from around the world.  With this new site, many new friendships and conversations started.  It was also time in my spirit to get “real” about who I was: a gay man ready to end a 20-year heterosexual marriage.  I had already come out to my siblings and friends at college and they loved me for who I was.  However, they were always worried about what would happen to me if I told certain people (for example: my wife, church friends, co-workers) about my sexual identity.  On Facebook, I didn’t have to hide who I was; I just had to restrict my friends and the content available to them. This gave me some freedom I had never had before. My relationship said “It’s Complicated” because that’s exactly what it was.

As 2009 ended, I had a large list of Facebook friends—in the thousands.  One of these people I had “friended” was Stuart.  I don’t really remember exactly what it was that caught my attention about him.  It was probably something witty he said to a conversation post that made me click his name and check out his profile.  I looked at Stuart’s profile for quite a while and then browsed through his photos.  Ultimately, I came to the first video he posted on Facebook.  The British accent charmed me instantly.  I had lived in the United Kingdom for over four years when I was serving in the U.S. military; that country has always been like a second home in my heart.  I wrote Stuart a message in response to the video caption.  He was putting himself down for how he looked on video camera.  I told him he didn’t look bad at all.  And so began a conversation of texts, chats, and e-mails.  At one point, Stuart mentioned another program called Skype.  My co-worker had just mentioned this new program and touted its benefits.  On April 26th, 2010, I made my first Skype call to the United Kingdom to talk to Stuart.  I was so nervous!  Hearing the accent, all I could say was, “Hi!  I like Monty Python!”  Stuart kind of rolled his eyes and suggested I check out Catherine Tate videos as a more updated form of British humor.

Oh yes, we started over the months chiding each other about spelling words (humor versus humour) as well as driving on the left.  Our relationship began as a friendship where two guys would share funny videos, laugh about stuff going on in the world news, and have intelligent conversations about nearly everything under the sun.  It was fun to have our occasional Skype talks while we also commented on mutual friends’ Facebook pages.

My coming out process continued. In 2010, I filed for divorce with my wife.  Stuart was one of the biggest emotional supports along with my family during this dark time.  In fact, my family had begun talking to him on Skype and approved of his positive influence on me.

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It was in the middle of this dark summer that the precious four-letter “L” word finally was spoken.  Stuart was on holiday in Egypt—and he was spending vast amounts of money and time just trying to talk with me on Skype.  It was me who quietly said it one evening; we were commenting on the full moon setting over the Nile River in the west just as it was managing to rise in my South Texas sky.  I dedicated the song “Somewhere Out There” from the movie An American Tail to Stuart in the form of a video.  I admitted to Stuart that I was falling in love with him.  He also admitted to me that he was in love with me and couldn’t stop thinking about us.  Stuart dedicated the music video “All the Man I Need” by Whitney Houston to me.  Crazy as it may sound to people, the relationship was founded on trust and open communication—not a physical in person meeting, at first.  This is quite opposite to the way many couples actually form, though in this age of the Internet it is certainly becoming more common.  One might even suggest that we had a Victorian-style courting courtesy of the digital age.

My divorce was finalized in November of 2010.  Stuart visited me soon afterward.  At the top of the Tower of Americas in San Antonio, I dropped to my knee and asked Stuart to be my husband.  He said “yes”.  We spent the next 19 months or so discussing getting married in the United States and other important family matters—especially his role as a stepfather to my children.  The more we got to know each other, the more eager we were to spend our lives together and plan our future.

In summer of 2012, Stuart and I visited my parents to get their official blessing for our marriage.  They gave it whole heartedly.  Then, we went to my hometown in Massachusetts to be married by a long-time friend of the family.  Although the actual civil ceremony was at most five minutes long, it was a major milestone for Stuart and me.  He became my husband and took on my surname.

His visits to the United States are met with great anticipation and preparation.  However, even with the joy of his arrival, there is the looming sadness that the clock is ticking until he has to return to the United Kingdom.  As his departure dates get closer on each visit, I go into a terrible depression.  After I drop him off at the airport, I become terribly emotional and then, as a result, physically ill.

Each time we part it feels like I am my entire being is being ripped out of my body and tossed away into the garbage.  There is this sense of unfairness I experience over and over because I have to lose my loving spouse on a technicality while an opposite sex couple in the same situation gets married on a whim but enjoys full equal civil rights, including the right to petition for their spouse for a green card.  The depression and accompanying illness gets worse with every visit because we ARE married and should be together.  Losing my spouse for such long periods of time tears me apart spiritually and emotionally.  Our home runs so beautifully when our children have two loving fathers physically at home.  When I am stuck being a single father again, it overwhelms me.

Holidays are especially difficult.  For three years now, I have not decorated the house or acknowledged the special days other than having to play extra services as an organist.  I long for the day that I can wake up on a Christmas morning to have a cup of coffee with my husband and spend the quality time together.  Then I will have the tree and all the trimmings to once again make the holidays special.  Until that day when equality is truly reached, my house will not play host to the holidays.

Because of the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA), I am not able to successfully sponsor Stuart for a green card. He cannot become a productive member of our community, he cannot be present as a stable and loving stepparent to my children, we cannot build a family life together.  This is the case even though we are legally married already under the laws of Massachusetts.  Because I have children as well as my extended family here in the United States, I cannot just pull up stakes and move to the United Kingdom, but I would not consider leaving my country and being forced into exile, regardless. I am an American. I have the right to live in my country with the man I love, and raise my children here. I will not be shoved out of my own country.

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We are currently stuck in a pattern where Stuart has to work an absurd number of overtime hours to afford plane tickets from London back to San Antonio.  Even then, he can only stay at most three weeks about twice each year.  No marriage should have to endure that kind of separation.  Even the military respects the hardships that deployments put on a couple.  How much more difficult is our situation because of an unfair and unconstitutional law discriminating against gay and lesbian binational couples and their families?

My husband and I are fighting for the chance to be together here at home with our children.  We fully expect the same civil rights and privileges that other loving couples enjoy.  Together with nearly a hundred other DOMA Project participant couples and thousands of others who have supported this campaign, we are urging the Obama administration to respect our legal marriage, to give real meaning to “states’ rights” and stop standing in the way of our marriage. Stop keeping us 5,000 miles apart.

As the Supreme Court considers the constitutionality of DOMA and Prop 8, we join with thousands of binational gay and lesbian couples to raise the profile of DOMA’s cruel impact on our families.  Please consider sharing our story with friends and family to expose the true sinister nature of DOMA and how it threatens to destroy (not protect) so many loving families.  With much hope, prayer, and effort, we eagerly work to persuade others that this discrimination has to come to an end. We are not sitting on the sidelines waiting for a decision from the Court. We are engaging in advocacy by sharing our story because we believe that we have the power to bring about change. Help us keep up the fight against DOMA in the three months left until the Supreme Court rules.

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This is a pro-bono project of the law firm of Masliah & Soloway, PC. Posts on this website are offered for informational purposes only and do not constitute legal advice. The law firm of Masliah & Soloway, PC has offices in New York and Los Angeles. Our practice is limited to U.S. Immigration & Nationality Law.